Adoptive Parents & Birth Mom
Although we are going through the “waiting” period of finding a match, we are fully aware of the trust and emotions a birth mother will presently and will continually go through. We know this is a lifetime decision and we feel honored that you will be putting your trust and support within Aaron and myself to care, love and cherish your child.
How many agency’s or moderators give support to the birth mom after placement? Yes, during the whole decision time of placing the baby up for adoption, but what about after the placement? I am curious as I have read many recollection by birth mothers who say the adoptive family didn’t hold up to their promise of sending pictures and updates and how they struggle with even getting in contact with the family.
If the agency’s are charging adoptive families these high fees, does this fee include after care and after placement therapy? Can anyone answer this question?
Tags: birth mothers
December 6th, 2008 at 12:15 am
Hi Guys, just saw your latest info on Twitter and was wondering how things were going with you. I can tell you that “usually” there is a contract between the adoptive parents and the birth mom and birth dad if he is involved as to what the contact will be, how much and how often, photos? emails? personal visits…
You should read my article in Root & Sprout’s web site’s December issue @
http://www.rootandsprout.com/20543/67901.html (scroll down the page halfway) to see my Q & A with a Birth Mom. Also, there is a great new book out, geared towards birth moms and what they go through called “So I Was Thinking About Adoption” by a woman named Mardie Cauldwell (NO Relation). I tell my adopting parents it is a MUST read.
The bottom line is, the post adoption contact is a mutual responsibility and with good communication it can be revised as need be as the birth mom’s life changes (she grows up, matures, gets involved in a new relationship or other such things) The key is flexibility and willingness to talk about your feelings.
Hope this helps.
Have you had any nibbles? Any updates? News?
Warmest regards,
Meg Coldwells
meg@myadoptioncoach.com